By Jay Morgan
I read it in profiles all over the Fetlife. The search for a single bi female, sought after with the same eagerness BDSM groups seek play-spaces, usually with the same disappointing result. Hungering for a unicorn, like a lion stalking a herd of Gazelles, never leads to a healthy threesome or the feast the couple is so desperately seeking. Alternatively, there is very little to any advertising for a single bi male, ostracized in much the same way as abortion, breath play, or the return to the gold standard.
As a believer in sex positive, laissez-faire anarcho-capitalism, there are not artificial “shortages”. There might be a finite supply, but if you are determined, supply will always meet demand. For example, there is no shortage of Picasso paintings, the price may be high, but there is no shortage. Consider this; do we have a “shortage” of roads at rush hour, or does the peak demand surpass peak quantity ?
One can easily see proof of this phenomena in the kink/bdsm world. Consider the Unicorn, the typically single, outgoing, perpetually cool, free spirit bi-sexual that is sought after by so many, singles and couples alike. The Unicorn, like discovering a particular kink that grabs you by balls and doesn’t let go, finds you. When someone makes the effort to create the right conditions to meet the Unicorn; getting out meeting people, helping out with events, volunteering, talking to that person at work that always wears the sexy leather heels, will allow for success. The interaction with people in these times will eventually bring the Unicorn sauntering across your path, whether platonic or sexual in nature.
On final analysis, there really is no shortage of Unicorn’s in the sexual context, regardless of whether you are swinger or kinkster. If a casual once in a while scene evolves into a friendship, which evolves into a permanent triad, quad, or house of lovers, then let it evolve that way. Forcing the issue on any one person, making your own standards so high they cannot be met, or feelings of inadequacy can sabotage any relationship, sexual or platonic.
A patient couple who creates the right conditions for success will more than likely see the rare unicorn cross their path. The Unicorn is out there, clopping through the woods, waiting for someone to run across its path. So get out of the house, meet some people and go where the supply is. Munches, play parties, conferences, there is no shortage of places to meet, nor are there shortages of unicorns.