Fat isn’t just a physical attribute; it’s an identity. Fat people tend to do two things when it comes to their appearance. The either let the fat define them, or they start defining what fat should be. When I realized that fat was going to be with me for the long haul I had to make that decision; I chose to define fat as sexy and beautiful.
A common misconception is that fat people have to be miserable and unhappy. I mean with all the diet pills and fads out there trying to push us all to get our bodies down to a socially acceptable level just so we can fit in are the top of the iceberg. Through all the media and poor light shed on being overweight it has caused many of my friends and acquaintances to become depressed when, if they would just look within, they could find their own happiness.
Using fat to define who you are is much like saying that all blondes are stupid or your momma is a good lay. We know there are myths and the jokes are just mere fun. So when I read a headline that says all fat people are lazy or unhealthy I want to laugh at the author. It’s not an acceptable decision to buy into the stereotypes that the media believes are true. People need to be more intelligent than to take something at face value anymore.
Fat Acceptance is a growing movement that tries to share the truth about being fat in that it doesn’t cripple us as part of the society but rather enriches it. They also help bring awareness to obesity discrimination and abuses based on someone’s weight.
Joining a group might be the answer for you, but let’s look inward for a moment. You are fat. You are going to be fat for awhile even if you do wish to lower your weight. Accepting your body as it is and loving it is the important first step to acceptance at large. Just because you’ve packed on a few (hundred) pounds does not mean you can’t look good, enjoy clothing and accessories, get your hair and makeup done on a regular basis and go about your life in comfort and pride.
I used to be where you are. I used to hide behind baggy sweat shirts and frumpy jeans. I used to let my personal hygiene go and stopped caring what I looked like. I was an ugly fat person, right? I wanted to blend into the background and not be noticed. What it did instead was make me a target. A very big target. In some ways I know now that I was just making the misconception more realized. I looked lazy and unhealthy. I felt lazy and unhealthy and I know that I even was lazy and unhealthy for awhile.
But once I accepted who I was and started loving my body for what it was and could (and couldn’t) do for me things started turning around for the better. I’m put together. I wear make up and do my hair every day. I care about how I dress and how it looks to others. I want to be seen as a beautiful, sexy fat woman. I think people see me now without the label of fat, even if I am.
There’s nothing wrong in that either. I’ve taken those steps to make fat a part of me, but not define me. Never again will I drag myself down by saying, “If only I were skinny, or thinner, then I could……” You can do it now. Stop telling yourself otherwise. There is glamor in curves, there is sex appeal in a soft squishy body and there can be health in a round rosy cheek.
Let us all redefine fat and not let fat redefine you! Begin using powerful words to describe yourself. You are confident and sexy. You are energetic and full of passion. These words are not untouchable to you. No longer should you feel chained to the stigma of obesity and fat culture. Embrace your curves and lumps. Men have written poetry about the human body since creation. You are just as much a muse as the next person. I want to see you start seeing that beauty can be found in you as well.